


Hold Every Memory

by chaote



Category: Homestuck
Genre: I wrote this before the epilogue came out so basically pretend the epilogue doesn't exist yet, M/M, POV Karkat Vantas, Post-Sgrub, Sadstuck, davekat is current and solkat is past, i guess it counts as sad..., there is no cheating in this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2020-10-05 20:25:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20494814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaote/pseuds/chaote
Summary: You’d given up on him.On sleepless nights you still skim through swathes of grey punctuated by warm yellow, smiling softly at the dumb arguments, his wise ass comments and your overly defensive retorts.Sometimes you cry. Sometimes you hate him.But all the same, you’d given up. You stopped looking out of the window every morning, stopped having that naked sliver of hope crushed every night. It had taken you a while, but you even have a boyfriend now. You love him. Sollux doesn’t come up in your thoughts as often as you used to, and when he does it’s in the little things, like the way Dave eats his pizza cold and insists it’s better that way. You smile and laugh more and think to yourself that you’re healing.





	Hold Every Memory

You’d given up on him.

On sleepless nights you still skim through swathes of grey punctuated by warm yellow, smiling softly at the dumb arguments, his wise ass comments and your overly defensive retorts.

Sometimes you cry. Sometimes you hate him.

But all the same, you’d given up. You stopped looking out of the window every morning, stopped having that naked sliver of hope crushed every night. It had taken you a while, but you even have a boyfriend now. You love him. Sollux doesn’t come up in your thoughts as often as you used to, and when he does it’s in the little things, like the way Dave eats his pizza cold and insists it’s better that way. You smile and laugh more and think to yourself that you’re healing.

Your life was finally getting its shit together. Then it all shatters.

Dave has his arm slung lazily over your shoulder as you walk along the stone path to your hive, fireflies darting around you. His breath smells like the pumpkin pie Harley had invited you two over to eat, and you swear once you get into your hive you’re going to kiss the shit out of him. You sigh at the figure standing in front of your door. It’s probably John, finally paying you two a visit after fuck knows how long, and you’re preparing exactly how to lecture him on taking better care of himself when the figure turns and your heart seizes in your chest. He’s taller than he used to be, with sharper features and a more defined jaw, and his hair is less of a bird’s nest, but no other asshole in the universe wears those stupid fucking red and blue shades. You watch, frozen, as his expression moves from wariness to excitement as he recognizes you and you watch as his eyes dart to Dave and the arm across your shoulder and you can do nothing but watch his grin falter. You can practically hear his heart shattering.

Dave is the one who breaks your breathless trance by exclaiming “Holy shit, it’s Sollux,” intelligently. You snap to attention and fish your keys out of your pocket. “It’s been a sweep and a half since I’ve seen your ugly excuse for a face, you’re coming inside and you’re not leaving again,” you say, not daring to look him in the eye as you move past him to the door. There’s a pause before he chuckles, and when you open the door he follows you and Dave inside. You still can’t tell whether this is a fucked up fever dream or if this is really happening, and when Dave leaves to make everyone drinks you stand there like a fucking idiot, biting your lip and worrying holes into your sweater hem.

After a minute he passes you to sit on the couch, and you get the faintest scent of that familiar mix of honey and cinnamon. Your heart lurches into your throat and you can almost feel his arms around you and his six sweep old voice murmuring against your hair that you’ll be okay.

“You’re going to break that table in half if you grip it any harder, KK,” comes a much deeper voice than you remember, a sardonic note to it that still feels like home. You missed his stupid fucking lisp. You look down at your white-knuckled hand and remove it from the table, the edge imprinted into the skin of your palm, and look up. He’s smiling at you, all dimples and bad teeth. You don’t know how he can do that. You might hate him for it.

“AA and Vriska are chilling over at Kanaya’s place, but I wanted to see you, so we split up,” Sollux continued, running his hands through his hair. “Ehehe…it was a bad idea to drop by on you unexpected. I’m sorry.”

You find the strength in your legs to move, sitting down next to him on the couch. Your brows furrow, voice cracking as you start, “Sollux, I–”

He holds up a hand and shakes his head. “I never expected you to wait for me. It just surprised me a little to actually see it, that’s all. I’m not going to ruin it, I promise.”

He smiles the most heartbreakingly pained smile you’ve ever seen, then kicks his feet up on the living room table like the grubfucker he is. “So Dave huh? He seems pretty cool. How’d y'all get started?”

So you tell him. You, Dave, and Sollux spend the rest of the night swapping stories and watching shitty movies. Dave and Sollux get along better than you expect, better than you want them to. You don’t know what you want anymore.

As the sun starts peeking into your windows, with Dave’s sleeping head in your lap, you get your ass kicked in Mario Kart for the 50th fucking time. You swear and Sollux sticks his tongue out at you, eyes sparkling with amusement. You chuck the controller at his smug ass face and he dodges it and laughs at you like an asswad. You tell him he is, in fact, an asswad. He grins.

“Hey KK?”

“What,” you huff.

“Are we still friends?”

The question hits you like a hammer to the throat. You can’t breathe.

You swallow your heart, and all the memories of brushing fingers and chaste, fumbled kisses. You choke on the memory of his happy, determined face staring into yours and promising forever.

“Yeah. We’re friends.”


End file.
